Confused much ?

Yes I am back for a 3rd time today but im super confused.
So my "friends with benefits" confuses me alot. I know there was sorta weird connection between us the first night we hung out and he told me he did like me .. I mean we go off and have sex and here i am the dumbass who fell for him.
Okay Like no deeply only a little.
I guess im the fool in this story right? They say girls should have fuck buddys. Well their right. I Like him. I like him.. It sounds so weird when I say it on here. Its like a little kid thing. Sorrta like puppy love with out the love. A little kid cush but not being a little kid. I guess theres no word for it. Maybe a fling? You could call it a fling. Where not dating. We call it our own thing. :( Confusion sucks. Not like I tell him any of this because when i told him i was falling for him well.. yah not as i expected. Thats the last time i listen to my so called best friend. In a way i feel like giving up just because ppl say its a waste of time. Yes i feel its not. .

Ugh. What to do what to do. Am I an idiot for liking him? I guess you can call me an idiot for feeling this way. Feelings are dumb. I sorta kinda wonder how he feels about me. Not like I can ask him straight up.. HEY YOU DO YOU LIKE ME BACK?
We sorta accomplished we will never date. Just because I have a daughter. Hes scared im scared. Nothing new. *sigh* Im a failure.